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How To Tell If You're Working For A Narcissist

The quickest way to tell if you are working for a Narcissist is to pay attention to how they use rules and moral laws. 

A company has certain rules and laws they uphold to make things fair, whether they believe in them or not. Sometimes, there are regulations imposed on them to put people on equal footing. 

What we've found to be a key indicator of narcissism, and if you have a narcissistic boss, is their intentions with using the rules:

  • Do they have the outward appearance of following the rules, but internally, they are using the rules to get what they want?
  • Are they manipulating data to get the result they want?
  • What is their driving intention towards interacting with the rules?
  • Are they operating secretly, behind the scenes to set up an appearance of following the rules, or to move forward with a personal plan?
  • Are you pressured to collaborate with them under urgent circumstances?

All these signs are red flags that you are working for a narcissistic boss. 

Now,...

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Empaths: How To Be Your Own Boss

A manager once told he that the worst bosses he had taught him the most... now that is an elegant thought but there is only so much suffering we should be allowed to take. The truth is, no one deserves to be treated unfairly by a person in power. 

This has to stop. This website is taking part in that (r)evolution. 

Most of my career has been under horrible bosses. My old manager was right in that they taught me the most -- they taught me what I was willing to accept in my life and what I wanted real empathy to look like in leadership. I decided to become my own boss. You can do that, too. Here's something to get you started.

How To Be Your Own Boss 

1) First realize that being your own boss does not mean starting your own business (but you can, if you want!) Being your own boss means empowering yourself to take responsibility for what you do, and perform quality work because if you were the boss, that's what you'd want. You take on the level of responsibility in your...

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Why Racism Still Happens In The Workplace: A Spiral Dynamics Perspective

In 1865, the Union won the US Civil War, and slavery became illegal in all states (as in, the states' rights to have it was abolished). 

In 1955, Rosa Parks, tired from a hard day's work, refused to move to the back of the bus. 

It's now 2019, but we are seeing that racism still exists in the corporate workplace. It's subtle, it's hidden. But it's still there in the minds and non-inclusive behaviors of employees. 

It's not just whites discriminating against people of color. It's the majority mindset. A famous Latin manufacturing company will never have a white guy on its leadership team. A large European financial firm will not ever promote any person without an important name of many last name strings into any influential position, or any person over 50 years old. A company in Southeast Asia with a mostly white management team coldly ignores the Asian workers in company parties and instead huddle together in groups, talking to no one else.

As much as many...

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The Secret CURE For Micro-Managing Bosses!

 
Do you remember being hounded by your mother or father to pick up your toys or do some menial task? Do you remember how it made you feel? That if you didn't do it right away, they would act like the world would end? Fast forward to today. Are you feeling triggered by a micromanaging boss? Someone who pings you every day asking for some unimportant administrative detail?
 
Let's look at why this happens, from both perspectives. Managers become micromanaging the same way parents do: because they want certainty in their lives. Micromanaging parents are insecure that their children won't know how to get out of trouble on their own. They cower over them thinking that they will protect them when what they are really doing is robbing them of their ability to make their own mistakes, and their own decisions.  
 
Micromanaging managers are insecure that they will be judged if they do not reach a target. They are insecure because deep inside, they do not feel capable of...
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3 Transformative Ways To Make Your Interview Unforgettable

by: Contributing writer

Have you ever wondered what makes an interview memorable to a manager? Do you struggle with getting noticed even if you have a significant skillset?

Sometimes a bad interview can dampen your vibe, and ruin the chances of getting where you want to be -- whether it be an internal move or landing that dream job. But it doesn't mean you have to pull a circus trick to get noticed. If you study, internalize and incorporate these 3 things, you'll be far ahead of anyone else in being remembered by the recruiter or hiring manager.

Here are 3 things I learned in my journey to make an interview unforgettable.

1) Know Your Purpose In Life

  • What can you do better than anyone else?
  • What can you do more effortlessly than anyone else?
  • What gives you pleasure to do for hours on end which no one asked you to do?
  • What interest could you research or talk about for hours & hours?
  • What would you do if money were no issue?

Often your purpose in life is rooted in what you loved...

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Why KPIs Should Be Obsolete

Managers Take Their Stress Out on Employees

A manager came to us struggling with a peculiar situation: he found out his employees were trashing him behind his back. It turned out that morale started getting very low and toxic after he had yelled at them for not achieving their deadlines on time. He had been under a lot of stress to meet KPIs -- so he would explode in rage to his employees.

This is not an uncommon scenario. People can be scarred by managers' anger, stress and rage taken out on them. Most of the time, the employee's intentions were very good, they gave it their all, yet they were punished. And work was never the same. That's when the environment started to get toxic, not just for the person who bore the brunt of managerial anger, but for everyone.

Maya Angelou said:

"I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how...
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7 Reasons Why Motivating Unproductive Employees Does Not Work

Why You Shouldn't Motivate An Unproductive Employee

How many of you have run a business, or managed a team which included at least one unproductive employee? Maybe this person has been the bane of your work life, and not being able to depend on them causes you stress? Perhaps after hiring him, you may believe that they have lied about their experience on their CV or resume? 

One of the toughest situations many managers regularly face, especially if they've inherited their team, is dealing with an unproductive employee. Consequently, many managers erroneously believe that the problem is caused by the employee's lack of motivation: If they are not performing, perhaps they need to be motivated. But this is rarely the case, as motivation is simply like placing a bandaid on a gaping wound. It doesn't address the underlying culture issues. 

When they find out inevitably that motivation and listening to them does not work, that's when managers often contact HR to help...

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Just Inherited A New Boss Who Is TOXIC? Here's What To Do!

Studies show that 80% of people are not happy with their current job -- and the #1 reason is due to their boss being toxic for them. What I've found working in the industry of Human Resources is that most of the time, this is not the boss that hires them, but the boss who inherited them. 

Although there are other influences, the reason is simple: People like those who are similar to them. People will promote, give the best opportunities to, and cut the most slack for people who remind them of themselves. It's not something they are aware of, and often an entirely automatic response of human beings. The boss that hired you thought you were right for the job AND felt a connection to you because you were similar to him/her. The boss that inherits you often will not be like you, so he/she has the mindset of using you as a resource to complete what needs to be done because it's harder to relate to someone unlike themselves. 

It all depends on the boss and the person, whether...

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5 Types of Toxic Bosses You Should Avoid At All Costs

As much as we try to avoid it, we as human beings are susceptible every day to baser emotions like envy, which results in hurtful gossip, unhealthy comparison to others, and sabotage. All of this contributes to a toxic environment in the workplace. Its effects exacerbate when we find our leaders, management, and bosses do not know how to transmute envy into positive and constructive emotions. 

Here are 5 toxic personas you should avoid at the workplace, especially if they are your boss! 

1.  Mr./Ms. Unpretentious

This type likes to cut the overly superior down to size. We may love this when they are attacking the braggarts, but the downside is - like the crab taking down any other crab that tries to escape the bucket - this type can never appreciate excellence. Their goal is to bring everyone one down to the same mediocre level they are so that they won't feel so bad about themselves. They have very fragile egos themselves. We only want to cut people down to size when...

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The Simple Dirty Trick To Increasing Your Salary By As Much As $20K

Here's a story how one woman used the common "dirty trick" to increase her salary by $20K. 

Disclaimer: This story is for entertainment purposes only. Situations may have been altered or are a mix of real life occurrences. Results may vary. EmpathInTheOffice.com does not assume responsibility or liability for any outcome obtained from acting on the elements in this article.

When I had worked in the line of business as a salaried employee, my mentors advised me never to accept the first salary offered, because the company can always offer more. I learned that most companies hold back on what they would pay you, and I learned several hard negotiating skills, but I never used them because I saw it as overly manipulative, and at the time I didn't have the self confidence I have now. 

However when I started working in HR, I found that the salary which was allocated to the position was mainly what was offered to the last person in...

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